Why Am I So Nervous Around My Crush? And How to Overcome It

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No matter what anyone says, nervousness is good.

It’s natural, and everyone goes through it. It’s a sign that you are on the right track.

However, if you are nervous to the point that you can’t even approach her or talk to her without fumbling through your sentences, then you have something to worry about.

Feeling nervousness is okay, but if it results in inaction, then it’s not. In this article, you will find out why you feel nervous around your crush and how to overcome it:

Man and woman sitting on sofa

Why Do I Feel Nervous Around My Crush?

First, you need to understand that you are not the only one who is nervous, most men and women feel the same way around their crush. Chances are your crush also feels nervous around you.

This nervousness is due to your perception, experience, mindset, hormones, etc and you probably will never be able to shake it off, however, you can learn to act boldly despite your feelings (Learn more about it below).

It’s simple. When you like someone, you start seeking their approval, you become self-conscious around them (And why does this happens? it’s human nature).

You want them to like you, you wish to impress them, and you want to avoid doing something that makes them dislike you. When you are around her, a constant stream of thoughts is flooding your mind ‘How am I looking,’ ‘Is she in a bad mood,’ ‘Does she like me?,’ ‘Do I have to pretend I like her friend.’

Moreover, Adrenaline is pumping through your nerves. You can feel it, something exciting can happen, or you can make a fool of yourself in front of your crush.

All of this is normal and this is the reason why you feel nervous around your crush.

I usually do everything overconfidently (one of my many flaws and the reason for most of my failures). But when I proposed to my crush, I was fumbling through my sentences. I felt like my head was going to explode. Luckily, she was kind. I went through the whole situation without getting fried out my nerves.

(Man, if you ever decide to propose to your crush, plan it properly. Any mistake you make can result in existential damage. And if something goes against your plan, keep your cool and play it cool.)

How to Overcome Nervousness Around My Crush?

This is the least traveled road. Most people never court their crush. Some out of fear, some due to their insecurities. However, if you have picked this path, keep in mind, you are moving toward something important, and it will take effort.

Here are five things you can do to overcome your nervousness around your crush:

Man doing yoga

1. Improve Yourself Mentally and Physically

The feeling of nervousness is sometimes due to a feeling of inadequacy, feeling that you are not good enough. For some, it’s not true. However, for most of us, it’s true.

It’s also true that everyone is equal. However, you have to learn how to take care of yourself before you start courting your crush. You can’t expect someone to reciprocate your feelings when your life and you are a mess.

So, take care of yourself by taking care of your hygiene, improving yourself physically and mentally, reading more, and getting your life on track.

This will reduce your nervousness for sure. Think about it, your style game is on point, you are fit and constantly making new PR, and you read daily and meditate daily; What do you think, ‘Would you feel more confident and less nervous this way or in your current condition?’

Reminding yourself she is nervous too, Visualizing talking to her confidently, planning your conversation beforehand; These things are not going to make much difference.

A solid improvement mentally and physically is going to reduce your nervousness, nothing else. Try to reach a point in your life where your crush finds talking to you nerve-wracking due to how awesome you are.

2. Learn to Act Boldly in Stressful Situations

Stress is your best friend, whether you know it or not. There will never be a situation where you will improve physically, mentally, financially, spiritually, and emotionally, and that situation is not nerve-wracking.

Stress, uncertainty, and nervousness is the sign that you are about to do something out of your comfort zone, something that is going to help you grow as an individual.

Of course, you are going to feel nervous around your crush; She may be the one.

You are going to feel nervous before you start a new venture. It may make you rich. You are going to feel nervous about the weight on the bar. It may help you gain tremendous strength.

Everything great in life is linked with pain, stress, and fear. You have to overcome it, and then and only then you reach where only a few can reach. That’s why you need to act boldly in stressful situations. Since the same rules apply to everything else in life.

What do you think will happen? All of a sudden, you will stop feeling nervous. You will start feeling excited & confident around your crush because of a magical spell.

What you need to do: Get used to putting yourself in stressful situations. Situations that help you grow as an individual. Your nervousness and fear will never go away, but you will gain the courage to act despite the fear. Even the best public speakers feel fear before their speeches. They just get used to acting boldly; stage fear never goes away.

Do you want to overcome your nervousness around your crush? The truth is you can’t. You just can’t switch-off part of your psyche, All you can do is get used to handling nervous situations confidently and boldly.

How can you get used to handling nervous situations confidently? By putting yourself consistently in uncertain situations, situations that make you nervous.

Go out and approach a bunch of strangers, do something exciting, go for a hike or climb a mountain, etc. Get used to being in uncomfortable situations comfortably, even if you are nervous.

Couple talking

3. Be Truthful in Your Approach

You aren’t fooling anybody. She knows you’re nervous and that’s a good thing.

You can handle your situation in four ways:

  1. Be truthful about how you feel.
  2. Try to act tough to elevate your chances of a successful relationship.
  3. Be truthful while acting tough to further elevate your chances of a successful relationship.
  4. Don’t approach them at all. Let your fear and nervousness keep you away from happiness. Keep thinking about them but never approach them.

There are only four ways to handle your situation. Being truthful and open about how you feel while shooting your shot is the best way to deal with it.

Don’t beat around the bush, be bold with your feeling. If you like her, let her know. If she doesn’t reciprocate your feelings, no biggie.

You still have done something most people shy away from. Next time if you like someone, letting them know how you feel at least won’t be a problem.

Man standing with open arms

4. Meet More People & Travel More

If you are used to living with an inflexible routine, you need to know that it impacts your perception and thought process in negative ways. You will become more closed off and anything that goes against your daily routine will result in stress and anxiety.

However, if you travel a bit more, it will broaden your mind, make you more open to challenges. You will start looking at life as an adventure rather than a job where you need to meet deadlines.

I think Shannon L. Alder quote explains it perfectly,

Your perspective on life comes from the cage you were held captive in.

Shannon L. Alder

You will develop yourself to a point where you won’t let petty emotion stand in the way of a beautiful life. You will meet different people from different cultures and different parts of the world. Your communication skill will improve greatly.

Moreover, if you travel alone, it’s even better (Prepare properly before you travel, there is a beautiful & dangerous world out there!). You will open yourself to new experiences, cultures, minds, knowledge, and emotions while depending on the person you can trust the most, yourself.

In a way, if you start traveling and do it consistently, you will change mentally, physically, and spiritually and most of these changes will positively affect every dimension of your life.

5. Understand She/He is a Normal Person

You may find this hard to believe due to all the hormones that rush through your veins when you think about her, making her just perfect. However, she is a normal person and you should avoid putting her on a pedestal.


The best part is nervousness and you will realize it sooner or later.

However, if you are nervous and you don’t think you have what it takes to talk to her without fumbling, work on yourself. Improve yourself mentally and physically.

Chances are you will never overcome nervousness completely, but by working on yourself, you can gain enough courage to act in the face of fear.

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Hi, I am Rudra, a computer engineer, and a certified procrastinator. I started FitnessGained in 2018 to help me stay fit despite all my desk time. Now I run this blog as a hobby. Here at FitnessGained, I will share what I do to stay fit & more. Our motto is "Reaching True Potential with Effort."

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